Express Yourself

Finally I selected the unusual way of communicating with a bestest friend as nothing is working out at this moment. Let me clarify one thing first that I don’t have anything to conclude here. Just another way of expressing myself.

Am sure by now you must be wondering why I have stopped talking to you. Did you take sometime to think as what could be wrong “between us” ? No. I got to know this from your reply yday. I too realized that you still remain as a child, who is not bothered about the happening around you.

See friend, I have lot of friends, some are just friends, some are good and few are best friends. You always belonged to the bestest category. But somehow I never understood your priorities in life. I don’t need friends in my happy times like dropping me home, going for a movie, to do masti, outings or even for shopping. I have the whole world with me to do the honor. I need my best friends when I’m in trouble and in the need of a helping hand. It might be a moral or physical support. But I need somebody beside me.

Take a look back, u were never there as my support. Not even as a moral support ever. I know am repeating this sentence, god knows how many times. But this time, I was very very pissed off by your reaction. I was in the deep shit and I needed your help. You didn’t even care to ask me, rather u blindly told me to “ignore”, which is very easy to advice, but to follow. I was suffering for no mistakes of mine, that too the blame was on my character, which is never acceptable for me. If you have a sister, who is facing the same problem, would it be the same reaction for her also ? I know you were also in a bad mood with lot of problems, but that doesn’t mean that u should not even ask a pal what shit is she going through.

If you remember, I fought with one of my friends, just bcos she talked bad abt you infront of me, I argued on your behalf and left talking to her just like that. Why I should do all these? Do I look like problem free person ? My heart cares and cries for my people, I do best for them. We spend time talking abt moon, rain and all bull shits which are of no use practically. U didn’t even feel like telling me that you are there with me, as a pal always. Now u say, that goes without saying, by default, right ? My dear, it is required at times. Am not at all upset with my so called friends (except few), bcos I don’t care for their concern abt me. But you ? We do have a healthy relation much more than just friendship, u agree ? I was always involved in your day-to-day life, issues, health, job, etc etc. Did u ask me to do all these ever ? Am I wrong in expecting a pinch of it when am really in need of u ? Do you think I expect a LOT from you ?

What did u understand when I said, I have to fight alone now ? Didn’t u feel am asking for ur support ? Now the issue has ended with the resignation by making myself bad and rude. That could have been ended, smoothly with ur help. I wanted to use your contacts to take it out from the base. But before I ask, you ended the topic saying nothing can be done, that was a cold reaction which I never expected from a friend like you. Trust me, am deeply hurt.

But anyways, I donno how much it has effected your inner feelings that am not talking to you. But never mind, I can’t hate you also. My feelings for you remain same for ever, but with a wet heart.

That’s all I wanted to communicate to you end of the day, but cudn’t do it orally. As I said I don’t want to conclude anything here. The life goes on as it was, your parents are my parents, your problems are my problems. I still care for you and will be doing in the future as well.

Take your call, and do whatever you want to express yourself.